Pigs and Twinkies I am an avid vegetable gardener. I refuse to grow anything I don’t like to eat, though. I put in about 25 tomato plants, 20 pepper plants, a half-dozen assorted squash, a boat-load of green beans, some…
On the Farm – The Last Cows
The Last Cows Late in our farm odyssey, we decided that cows were a little too much responsibility, and really cramped your style for things like summer vacations. During our last summer with cows, we tried to go off on…
On the Farm – The Herd
The Herd No farmer is a real farmer without livestock. After practicing with goats, we made the decision to take the plunge and bought three feeder calves. This was done partly to qualify for a farm income credit on our…
On the Farm – Homicidal Pigs
Homicidal Pigs George Orwell knew what he was doing when he wrote Animal Farm, as pigs are far and away the smartest animals. They lull you to sleep by lying around all day, but given an opportunity, they can do…
On the Farm – Rick vs. the Groundhog
Rick vs. the Groundhog Groundhogs are plentiful in Pennsylvania. We have Punxutawney Phil, the most famous one in the world a scant 80 miles away. They are all over the place, and while not overtly dangerous, they dig holes in…
On the Farm – Buying the Farm
Buying the Farm The patron saint of would-be farmers is Oliver Wendall Douglas, Esq. Any Green Acres fan knows that Oliver, a successful Manhattan lawyer, chucked it all to drag his wife to Hootersville and bought a farm. Watch one…
On the Farm – Goats and Poison Ivy
Goats and Poison Ivy Goats have a knack of eating things that no other animal will eat. What a goat loves more than life itself is the tender branches and leaves of a weeping willow tree. You can pretty much…
On the Farm – Goat Peyton Place
Goat Peyton Place Goats get a bad rep. The Bible has not one good thing to say about goats. If you’re a sheep, then Jesus is going to be there to shepherd you. But if you’re a goat, expect it…
On the Farm – Safe Sex with Turkeys
Safe Sex with Turkeys Most people at work knew I had a farm. I had to turn down offers of an ostrich, a de-natured skunk, and a large snake. “Yeah, no thanks, we don’t keep many snakes out on the…
On the Farm – Nose-less Louie and the Pink Chick of Doom
Nose-less Louie and the Pink Chick of Doom When you have a farm, you are an obvious dumping ground for any ill-advised livestock purchase gone wrong. When I was a kid, they used to dye baby chicks different colors for…